If a woman decides that her breasts are sexual then we have to accept that. If she decides that her breasts are purely for feeding her baby and that they lack any sexual meaning whatsoever, then that’s her truth. Breasts are whatever we want them to be. “We” as in the owners of them. Society has decided that we are not the owners of our breasts and that they are sexual because everyone else wants them to be. This is how a woman’s body becomes sexualized, and it’s not about sex, it’s about control. This way we remain sexual in the eyes of society and our primary purpose is to sell products and satisfy sexual fantasies.
Before I had kids the primary purpose of my breasts was sexual. I flaunted them like a peacock showing its feathers. Now that I am a mother they have a more primary purpose of breastfeeding. I still think of them as sexual, but they are not really in use that way right now, because, seriously, if one more person touches my boob… But I have already started digging through my old sexy bras and wearing low cut tops again. This is how I express my feelings of sexuality about my breasts. It is enjoyable to me. Me, the owner of my boobs.
Sexualizing a woman breaks her into a collection of sexual pieces to be used at someone else’s will. A woman is a whole being, multifunctional, dynamic and deep. It’s for us to decide when, where and how we are sexual. And sexuality is rarely easy to identify as this is just one of the aspects of our fluid and flowing existence that is decided by the individual woman. Surprise, surprise, no two women express their sexuality exactly the same way. Take the emphasis off of the one body part and place it on a whole being of which there are multiple layers. We are free to express those as we see fit. Not how it makes others comfortable.
Some women want their breasts to be seen and used sexually; that’s their right as the owner of their breasts. But society has oversexualized women’s breasts to astounding proportions. Most people think a foot fetish is strange or deviant, but think about how deeply we have fetishized the breast. Breasts have become so detached from women as whole people they are practically bouncing around with a life of their own.
When a boob is just a boob it’s for feeding a baby. The sexual attributes are applied separately and those are culturally bound. I don’t look at a man’s fingers and get excited, but when we’re having sex his fingers become one of the most sexual parts of him. When we are not having sex or using our breasts sexually then there is really no real reason to view them sexually. Except that most people do because of what our culture has done to breasts.
People may find us sexually attractive even when we are not expressing this. People may lust after our body parts or feel sexually aroused when they see our breasts. But the bottom line is that’s not our problem.
