{"id":5455,"date":"2020-05-17T18:37:17","date_gmt":"2020-05-17T18:37:17","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/thebadassbreastfeeder.com\/?p=5455"},"modified":"2020-05-17T18:40:33","modified_gmt":"2020-05-17T18:40:33","slug":"you-need-me","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/thebadassbreastfeeder.com\/?p=5455","title":{"rendered":"You Need Me"},"content":{"rendered":"\n

By Cydney Damo,<\/p>\n\n\n\n

9 months postpartum. This is the real, raw image of my life 9 months into motherhood. No, my body didn\u2019t \u201cbounce back\u201d and that\u2019s ok. I probably eat more carbs than I should. I probably eat more sweets than I should. Most of the time I don\u2019t eat breakfast and then sometimes I don\u2019t eat lunch until 3pm and then eat supper at 7 but that\u2019s ok. Sometimes I scarf my food down while my baby girl is sitting in my lap trying to slap the food out of my hand… and that\u2019s ok. I promise you, despite what social media may tell you.. it\u2019s not all \u201crainbows and butterflies\u201d babies cry. babies scream. babies want YOU and sometimes ONLY YOU.<\/p>\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n

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My girl is 9 months old and I can\u2019t even put her down so I can take a shower. I can\u2019t sit on the toilet alone. She wants me… she needs me… she\u2019s crying and screaming… for ME.

I just want a shower…. that\u2019s all, is that too much to ask? I just simply want to feel the hot water on my body in peace. I want quietness. I really don\u2019t want to be bothered. Is that bad? I want 5 short minutes to have my body to myself… no one touching it but right now, I can\u2019t. Because you need me

Sure, you just ate… so you\u2019re not hungry. You need comfort. I pulled the curtain back so you could see me but that\u2019s not enough.. you need to touch me. You need to feel me. You need to know I\u2019m there.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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I think to myself, maybe I\u2019m doing this all wrong? Maybe I shouldn\u2019t have let her sleep with us since day 1… maybe I shouldn\u2019t have let her nurse ALL. DAY. LONG…. she\u2019s 9 months old and still nursing every 3 hours, sometimes more……
But no. I\u2019m not doing this wrong. I\u2019m doing this right. I\u2019m a great mama and I\u2019m doing what is best for my baby. She\u2019s happy and healthy and that\u2019s what matters.

So what if she\u2019s clingy? Right now she needs me… one day she won\u2019t be crying outside the bathroom door or on the other side of that shower curtain and I\u2019ll miss that. I\u2019ll miss those sweet little lips trembling because she wants to be close to me. I\u2019ll miss her pulling at my breasts wanting to nurse for a just few minutes. She\u2019ll always be my baby but one day I\u2019ll miss how small she once was, how fragile she once was.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

So for now, I\u2019ll hold you sweet baby. I\u2019ll hold you close to me. I\u2019ll let you nurse for as long as you wish. On the couch, at the dinner table, in bed, or in the shower. It doesn\u2019t matter sweetie because I\u2019m here and I\u2019m never leaving you. Because YOU need me.<\/p>\n\r\n