I lost my little girl September 2011 to Anencephaly shortly after she was born. I had a c-section so I could hold her alive. In May 2012 I found out I was pregnant again. I was terrified. After finding out he was going to be perfectly healthy I calmed down. I started researching VBACs and I was dead set on having a natural birth (well as natural and peaceful as I could in a hospital) at 38 & a half weeks I went into labor.
After 8 hours I had NO progression and the doctor agreed a RCS would be a good idea. I’m glad my instincts kicked in and I asked for it. When he got me open he leaned over and casually said “We will talk about this later but I can see through your uterus.” I was so stretched my SO described my uterus looking like a water balloon that was overfilled. Scary stuff. I also had a dehiscence and almost bled out. It took them over two hours to finally bring my baby to me. I kept reading that women who have c-sections have a different bond and are less likely to be able to or choose to breastfeed. I was dead set on breastfeeding and it killed me thinking I may not be able to do it. I wasn’t allowed to hold my baby in the OR because of the tear my SO took baby to the nursery and (after fighting the nurses) practiced kangaroo care with the baby until he was finally able to bring him to me in recovery. I unswaddled him and put him against my skin, offered him my breast and he latched right on. I have never been so proud of myself. It was amazing. Five months later & we are still EBF! I attached a picture a nurse took of me holding our baby boy for the first time and nursing him for the first time!
“Keely Riffe”
